While everyone in my blog is an actual person (real or not is debatable) no one's actual name is used. This page is a character listing to help you (and myself) to keep everyone in order.
Ms. Humble: That would be me, you idiot.
Gus: My fantastic 19 month old son. He's better than you're kid. That's right, I said it.
Princess Buttercup: One of my best friends, getting married early June, total sweetheart and one of those "Do It Yourself" type people-like a domestic MacGyver.
Cocoa Von Hoffman: Co-worker who keeps me away from the edge with her hilarious emails, by far the funniest female I have ever had the privilege of knowing.
Wesley: Princess Buttercup's hubby-to-be.
Mom: My mom, you idiot.
Dad: Seriously?
Alfie: My older brother who can do no wrong. He lost his balls in the marriage.
Lucy: Alfie's wife. Lucy is short for Lucifer, she has perfected passive aggression.
Devon: My nephew who's 9 months old, chubby and, looks-wise, the perfect combination between his parents.
Dora: Princess Buttercup's younger sister, lives the ideal life, completely adorable and often babysits Gus. I've adopted her as my younger sister.
Beardsley: A co-worker with 17 different personalities, only one is nice and I'm pretty sure one is from the USSR since it's often paranoid.
Pooper: Best friend from college, tall skinny girl with an accent that is a cross between French, Minnesota and something else that has yet to be named, total sweetheart.
Schnookems: Other best friend from college, petite girl who tells me how it is and keeps me in line. Basically Tinkerbell but with better fashion sense.
Ette: Former college roommate, one of my closest friends, can go weeks, months, years without seeing each other and pick up right where we left off.
The Duchess of Gak: Basically me but from Wisconsin, blond and, obviously, not as cool.
Wicked Witch of the West: Wesley's mother, certifiable.
TweedleDee: A college volleyball player who often babysits Gus.
TweedleeDum: A college volleyball player who USED to babysit Gus until she proved how big of a moron she is. Her father is one of my co-workers.
Jezebel: A, um, "friend" who has screwed me over in more ways than one.